Sermon Illustrations


LONDON – Willy Wonka would be horrified. Children who eat too much candy may be more likely to be arrested for violent behaviour as adults, new research suggests.

British experts studied more than 17,000 children born in 1970 for about four decades. Of the children who ate candies or chocolates daily at age 10, 69 per cent were later arrested for a violent offence by the age of 34. Of those who didn’t have any violent clashes, 42 per cent ate sweets daily.

The study was published in the October issue of the British Journal of Psychiatry. It was paid for by Britain’s Economic and Social Research Council.

The researchers said the results were interesting, but that more studies were needed to confirm the link. “It’s not that the sweets themselves are bad, it’s more about interpreting how kids make decisions,” said Simon Moore of the University of Cardiff, one of the paper’s authors.

Moore said parents who consistently bribe their children into good behaviour with candies and chocolates could be doing harm. That might prevent kids from learning how to defer gratification, leading to impulsive behaviour and violence.

Even after Moore and colleagues controlled for other variables like different parenting skills and varying social and economic backgrounds, they found a significant link between childhood consumption of sweets and violent behaviour in adulthood.

Previous studies have found better nutrition leads to better behaviour, in both children and adults.

Moore said his results were not strong enough to recommend parents stop giving their children candies and chocolates. “This is an incredibly complex area,” he said. “It’s not fair to blame it on the candy.”

An Audi sedan written off by an elderly German woman as stolen two years ago has resurfaced – in her neighbour’s garage beneath a thick layer of dust.

Police said Thursday the 82-year-old from the northern city of Hildesheim took the car in for repairs two years ago and had the mechanics drive it back to her house and park it in her garage.  She got the keys and papers from her mailbox, but when she went to get the car it was nowhere to be found. So she reported it stolen.

Fast forward to Wednesday when her neighbour went to clean up his unused garage so it could be rented. He found the car under “a centimetre-deep coating of dust.”  It didn’t take police long to piece together that the mechanics had parked it in the wrong garage.

Police in Utah say a 7-year-old boy led officers on a car chase in an effort to avoid going to church.  Dispatchers received reports of a child driving recklessly on Sunday morning. Weber County Sheriff’s Capt. Klint Anderson says one witness said the boy drove through a stop sign.

Anderson says two deputies caught up with the boy and tried unsuccessfully to stop the Dodge Intrepid in an area about 45 miles (72 kilometres) north of Salt Lake City. The car reached 40 mph (64 kph) before the boy stopped in a driveway and ran inside a home.

Anderson says when the boy’s father later confronted him, the boy said he didn’t want to go to church. The boy is too young to prosecute and no citations were issued, although police did urge the father to make his car keys more inaccessible to children.

Do all these things and you will be rewarded greatly:

  1. Speak to people no matter where you are at.
  2. Smile at people. Give the world some sunshine.
  3. Call people by their names
  4. Wave at people
  5. Be warm and cordial
  6. Act like it is a genuine pleasure to serve
  7. Be generous with praise
  8. Be truly interested in people. Try hard and you can find something good about anyone.
  9. Maintain a good sense of humor in all situations. Help people to laugh
  10. Have patience and serve with humility

1. Don’t buy anything that plugs in. Anything that requires electricity is seen as utilitarian.

2. Don’t buy clothing that involves sizes. The chances are one in seven thousand that you will get her size right, and your wife will be offended the other 6999 times. “Do I look like a size 16?” she’ll say. Too small a size doesn’t cut it either: “I haven’t worn a size 8 in 20 years!”

3. Avoid all things useful. The new silver polish advertised to save hundreds of hours is not going to win you any brownie points.

4. Don’t buy anything that involves weight loss or self-improvement. She’ll perceive a six-month membership to a diet center as a suggestion that’s she’s overweight.

 5. Don’t buy her a fire extinguisher.

6. Finally, don’t spend too much. “How do you think we’re going to afford that?” she’ll ask. But don’t spend too little. She won’t say anything, but she’ll think, “Is that all I’m worth?”

This seems rather disturbing.  Secular groups would generally oppose billboards promting conservative Christianity (indeed they have in Kingston), yet they find nothing wrong with promoting their own twisted beliefs.  There is nothing more intolerant thant an Evolutionist or an atheist or for that matter an agnostic. 
The following story is from CBC:
GRAND JUNCTION, Colo. – “A U.S. secularist group is observing the 200th birthday of Charles Darwin with billboards that urge people to “evolve beyond belief.”   The Freedom From Religion Foundation has placed “Praise Darwin” billboards in Grand Junction, Colorado; Dayton, Tennessee; Dover, Pennsylvania and Whitehall, Ohio.   They feature stained-glass designs and a picture of the evolutionary theorist born Feb. 12, 1809.   The Tennessee and Pennsylvania towns had landmark court cases about the teaching of evolution.   Many in the religious right believe in “intelligent design” – a literal interpretation of the Bible that questions Darwin’s theory of evolution.   The Wisconsin-based foundation is made up of agnostics and atheists opposed to government displays of religion. “

A B.C. man probably wishes he had given his 11-month-old son a set of keys to play with instead of a phone, after the infant accidentally dialled 9-1-1 and brought police to dad’s marijuana grow operation.   Mounties say a 9-1-1 call came in from a White Rock, B.C. residence Friday morning but whoever was on the other end of the line hung up. Officers arrived at the residence and after numerous knocks on the door went unanswered, they entered the home.  “The gentleman was quite surprised,” said White Rock RCMP Const. Janelle Canning.   She said the 29-year-old male, startled by the sudden sight of police, insisted he hadn’t made the call.   When it was suggested a child might have dialled, the father objected and said his son was far too young.

That’s when police spotted the baby boy, phone in hand.   “We saw him playing with the cordless phone and just pressing all the buttons, so evidently he had called 9-1-1,” Canning said.   With that mystery solved, officers began inspecting the residence and soon discovered a 500-plant marijuana grow operation.   The father was arrested and will appear in court in early April on charges of production of a controlled substance and mischief.   The boy was removed from the home by the Ministry of Children and Family Development, though he was later released into his mother’s custody.   The mother does not live in the residence and Canning says she had no idea what was going on at the home.

NASA’s soon-to-be-retired space shuttles are up for grabs.  The space agency says it’s looking for ideas on where and how best to display its space shuttles once they stop flying in a few years.  It’s put out a call to schools, science museums and “other appropriate organizations” that might be interested in showcasing one of the three remaining shuttles.

But beware — NASA estimates it will cost about $42 million to get each shuttle ready and move it where it needs to go, and the final tab could end up much more.  The estimate includes $6 million to ferry the spaceship atop a modified jumbo jet to the closest major airport.  But the price could skyrocket depending on how far the display site is from the airport.  Only indoor, climate-controlled displays will be considered.

“The orbiters will not be disassembled for transportation or storage,” NASA insists in its nine-page request for information.  One space shuttle appears headed to the Smithsonian Institution’s National Air and Space Museum in Washington. The remaining two would be placed in storage at Kennedy Space Center until their final homes are decided.  If a space shuttle is too pricey, NASA is offering some of its shuttle main engines for anywhere between $400,000 and $800,000, not counting shipping costs.

The space shuttles, so you know, will not come with any main engines.  NASA plans to retire Discovery, Atlantis and Endeavour by Sept. 30, 2010, in keeping with President George W. Bush’s initiative calling for a return by astronauts to the moon by 2020.  A transition team set up by president-elect Barack Obama is reviewing all the options, however, including the possibility of keeping the shuttles flying beyond 2010.  If that happens, then all space shuttle deals are off.

One of the oldest toys that have occupied children for hours has been added to the “Toy Hall of Fame” – joining the likes of Mr. Potato Head and the Skateboard.  The common stick found in your backyard, for FREE. 

A stick can become many things in a child’s imagination.  It can become a sword, gun, sceptre, rod, etc.  It can be the seat or source of power.  It can be whatever a child wants it to be.  The “Toy Hall of Fame” has added this toy do to its popularity amongst children of the past and present.  Best of all those of you parents looking for the ideal stocking stuffer… just look in your backyard!

The old man placed order for one hamburger, French fries and a drink.

He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one
half in front of his wife.

He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles
and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.

He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down
between them. As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people
around them were looking over and whispering.

Obviously they were thinking, ‘That poor old couple – all they can afford is
one meal for the two of them.’

As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table and politely
offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said, they were
just fine – they were used to sharing everything.

People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn’t eaten a bite.
She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping
the drink.

Again, the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal
for them. This time the old woman said ‘No, thank you, we are used to
sharing everything.’

Finally, as the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the
napkin, the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet to
eat a single bite of food and asked ‘What is it you are waiting for?’

She answered

‘THE TEETH’

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